I Am Not An Animal

When I went to high school everyone raved about one teacher, a teacher who was cool and funny, someone who made kids laugh and was quite relaxed about the rules.  My step sisters knew him from a different school and they were of the same opinion.  I was quite excited when I found he was to be one of my teachers but it didn't take long for me to realise he was a twat.

I started doubting Christianity at an early age, it all seemed a little bonkers to me.  Mr, hmmm, let's call him Mr Jesus, taught me Religious Education and one of my questions to him when we were doing the whole "God created man in his own image" bit was, "So if human beings are animals, is God an animal?".  "WHAT?", he shouted quite dramatically.  "I'm not an animal, are you an animal Baeron?  I bet you're a monkey!", and then he rallied the class, "Are you animals children?  Let's all make monkey noises at Baeron".

Luckily I wasn't too self conscious about this and I strongly believe that despite everyone singing his praises this man was an absolute prick.

Any road, I've just learned that he's dead.  You're not an animal any more Mr Jesus, and I still think you're a prick.

(On a separate note I did a Google search for an image to go with this post and was drawn to a page named 'debate.org' where this question was being 'debated'.  It is currently 74% in favour of humans being animals with most of the people in the other camp claiming the whole 'God made us' argument.  One of the arguments to suggest humans were animals began 'All humans are marsupials and marsupials are mammals'.  I laughed and closed the page down.)



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