Fat Dwaff (Dwarf!)
We went to Ramsbottom Chocolate Festival over the weekend, what a freakin nightmare. Too many people in too little of an area. I’m pretty sure that you get a more than average amount of fattys at a chocolate festival, it only makes sense doesn’t it? If you had a running festival for instance you’d get a more than average amount of racing snakes. But it isn’t the mega massive people that concern me, it’s the fat dwarf like people, the fatty’s that are under 5ft tall, very low centre of gravity and often wider than they are tall. Because in a crowd you can’t see them too well, and it’s then when you’re in danger of being trod on.
We got the hell out of there pretty quickly, paid £2 for Darwin to have an uncomfortable go on a bouncy castle for 3 minutes and then made our way to Aldi. We didn’t need to do any shopping, this was our way of keeping Darwin occupied for some minutes whilst we waited for the train.
Afterwards we bobbed into a craft shop, again to kill a bit of time. As I was looking around I came across some tubes of oil paint endorsed by Rolf Harris. An assistant was near so I asked if they were giving discount on this paint and did they have any (Gary) Glitter? I was making myself laugh when he joined in too, “Maybe you would like some Jonathan Mask King tape?” We were joking about sex offenders, it felt uncomfortable but I was racking my brain to find more puns. As I was thinking about Freddie Gold Starr, Stu ART Hall and Jimmy Savill (no pun conceived!) whilst paying for my goods (some animal shapes for making biscuits/cakes) I was given a free pencil, see below.
Hitler’s desk was auctioned for $1 million and even a set of cutlery went for $16K. I wonder if the pencil will be worth owt in years to come?
We got the hell out of there pretty quickly, paid £2 for Darwin to have an uncomfortable go on a bouncy castle for 3 minutes and then made our way to Aldi. We didn’t need to do any shopping, this was our way of keeping Darwin occupied for some minutes whilst we waited for the train.
Afterwards we bobbed into a craft shop, again to kill a bit of time. As I was looking around I came across some tubes of oil paint endorsed by Rolf Harris. An assistant was near so I asked if they were giving discount on this paint and did they have any (Gary) Glitter? I was making myself laugh when he joined in too, “Maybe you would like some Jonathan Mask King tape?” We were joking about sex offenders, it felt uncomfortable but I was racking my brain to find more puns. As I was thinking about Freddie Gold Starr, Stu ART Hall and Jimmy Savill (no pun conceived!) whilst paying for my goods (some animal shapes for making biscuits/cakes) I was given a free pencil, see below.
Hitler’s desk was auctioned for $1 million and even a set of cutlery went for $16K. I wonder if the pencil will be worth owt in years to come?
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