Beating Kenny G to Death
Last week I found myself in my car listening to Steve Wright in the Afternoon in a traffic jam. I know I shouldn't have. He played a Kenny G tune. Is Kenny G the most annoying person in the music industry or what? In fact I don't know whether it's Kenny himself or his annoying little army of tiny saxophones that annoy me most. And then to top it off, Steve Wright followed Kenny G with Lisa Stansfield! I know, I should have simply have tuned to a new station rather than let my anger levels rise.
However, I managed to control my anger by imagining them both in the same room waiting to go on stage. I grab Kenny's Alto Sax and quickly deliver a sweeping blow to Lisa's neck hitting her where her Adams Apple ought to be if she was a man. And then with Lisa on her knees grabbing her throat and sounding like Bernard Manning I beat Kenny to death with his Alto Sax and leave it popping out of his bum.
The traffic jam was over before I knew it.
However, I managed to control my anger by imagining them both in the same room waiting to go on stage. I grab Kenny's Alto Sax and quickly deliver a sweeping blow to Lisa's neck hitting her where her Adams Apple ought to be if she was a man. And then with Lisa on her knees grabbing her throat and sounding like Bernard Manning I beat Kenny to death with his Alto Sax and leave it popping out of his bum.
The traffic jam was over before I knew it.
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| "Kenny and his Crap Instrument" |
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